What can you learn from The Celebrity Apprentice? Not much, really.. In the Celebrity Apprentice, the celebrities raise money by calling on their wealthy friends. The bigger your rolodex, the better chance you have of winning. Let’s face it – You can’t sell a cupcake for $1000 in the REAL world.

But as we’ve seen time and time again, it’s all about who they know. How does this apply to the online world? It’s all about building your list.

John Chow, Shoemoney, and countless other bloggers have been drilling this concept into your head for months and months now.. And while their motives may not be entirely pure (ie. Aweber referral commission), they’ve got a point. Build an e-mail list from your website customers (or blog visitors), and when you’ve got a product or promotion to push, you can reach out to them with just a few clicks.

I’m not jumping on the Aweber bandwagon. There’s nothing wrong with it, but I’ve been using Constant Contact for years now, and I’m 100% happy with them. They’re cheaper, offer a 60-day free trial, and offer the same features that the other guys do.

So what are you waiting for? Start building your list today.. You won’t be sorry!

Nobody likes a complainer. But you may just be doing the company a favor by bringing a quality control issue to their attention!

In my business, I often solicit feedback from past customers, to find out what we did right, and where we could improve on. It’s a proactive approach, but in the world of etailing, you’re not likely to hear about dissatistied customers – You just won’t hear from them again!

In the “real world”, do you voice your complaints if something isn’t up to your standards? Whether it’d bad service at a restaurant, a product you purchased that failed prematurely, or any other issue that needs to be addressed, you should let the company know. You might just be surprised with their response.

Here are some examples:

1) We’ve been going to a particular steakhouse for over a year, driving almost 40 miles to get there. The average meal for two costs a little over $100. It’s an amazing dinner, and we always look forward to it. Recently, they opened up a location literally 5 minutes from our home. So naturally, we had to go. Unfortunately, the level of service there wasn’t up to par at all. It was an absolute nightmare, and if I was a first-time diner, I’d never come back!

So I e-mailed them through their website, and told them of my experience. A manager contacted me, we ended up talking on the phone about the issues from the other night, and he vowed to personally address each and every concern of mine.

A few days later, I received a letter in the mail from the restaurant, along with a $100 dining voucher to use on our next visit! They wanted me back, and I was happy to give them another chance. And I’m happy to say that our next visit was perfect, the way it should have been the first time around. Had I not voiced my opinion, they may have continued down that path for some time before fixing their issues.

2) My wife had an expensive ceramic hair dryer fail on her about a month after the warranty expired. With nothing to lose, she e-mailed them through their website, and told them about her situation. Given the price and perceived quality of the product, there’s no way it should have quit so suddenly. And the company agreed. They asked her to mail the hair dryer back to them (so they could see what failed), and they sent her a brand new one at no charge! (Other than the cost to ship the old hair dryer back)

3) On the flip side, we had a customer that was unhappy with a product they purchased from us. Mind you, there was nothing wrong with the product itself – They just felt that they paid too much for it! And our “All Sales Final / No Returns” policy didn’t leave him any recourse. Most people will just accept the fact that they made a mistake, but this guy was determined to make my life hell.

Long story short, we ended up refunding him a portion of his money, and broke even on the sale. Will he ever buy from us again? Probably not. But the time and effort it would have taken to fight a chargeback wasn’t worth it. Plus, we didn’t want anyone smearing our reputation on the web, especially over something so small and insignificant.

Food for thought!

In the wonderful state of New Jersey, you’re required to get your car inspected every two years. They claim that it keeps the roads safer, but it does no such thing. Every day, I see cars that shouldn’t even be allowed on the road, and they’re somehow driving with a valid inspection sticker. Go figure.

In any event, my Boxster needed to be inspected last month. I went there early one morning, only to find the statio closed for Lincoln’s Birthday. Gotta love government agencies and all of their observed holidays! So I went back a few days later, and they failed me.

My car has 45K miles, and is driven about 200 miles a MONTH. Yet according to them, my emmissions were almost double what they should be! The legal NOx limit in NJ is 696. I registered nearly 1200. Two years ago, I came in at 27. WTF?!

I did some minor maintenance, got a fresh tank of gas, and warmed up the car before heading over to the DMV. Just my luck, there’s 50+ cars in line ahead of me! And as I’m going through my things, I realize that I don’t have my new insurance card yet. FUCK! So I call my insurance agent, and they print up a new card for me. Now I get out of line, drive CLEAR ACROSS TOWN to pick it up, and then return to the DMV. Total trip took 45 minutes. Now there’s about 100 cars in line! My day just keeps getting better.

1 HOUR LATER, I finally get to the front of the line. They wave me over to Lane 1, and I wait my turn. A trusty DMV employee has me exit my car, and pulls it up about 5 feet. And there it sat, for the next 20+ minutes. All of the cars behind me went into other lanes and blew by me. DMV girl must have gone out for a smoke break or something.

She finally comes back, runs my car through the emmissions test, and I pass. My NOx dropped to 200! I’m thankful that this ordeal is over. I wasted over 3 hours today dealing with this BS!

A strange thing happened last week. A client of mine needed a place to host their new blog, so I sent him a link to my shared hosting company of choice. And of course, I sent him an affiliate link, so I could collect that $100 bounty!

A few days go by, and I don’t see any record of the sale in CJ. So I contacted CJ support, who suggested that I contact the advertiser through the CJ mail system. That was a dead end, as they don’t appear to check their mail on CJ. I found their affiliate contact e-mail address, and I was able to talk to someone that handled their affiliate program. They were able to track down my customer with the information I provided to them, but in their words “if the cookie is not tracked we can not payout for the sale.”

WTF?! They tried feeding me lines about cookies being cleared, security settings being too high, etc. They placed the blame on CJ. CJ says it’s the advertiser’s problem. In the end, I’m out $100.

I could have my client move his site to another host, and cancel his current plan under their 30-day money back guarantee. But honestly, the reason I had him go with these guys is because they offer great hosting. I don’t want him to suffer by going with a “lesser” host. The whole situation really frustrates me.

What would you do?

I was at the Borgata in Atlantic City this weekend, and they seemed to be thriving, even with the economic recession we’re in. Some people have cut back, and as a result there are currently some GREAT deals on cheap rooms at all of the major casinos. But at the poker tournament, there was NO shortage of cash!

On Sunday nights, most of the high-end restaurants are closed. So we ended up eating at the “food court” downstairs.. Two Cheesesteak combos from Tony Luke’s? That’ll be $28.96. Gotta love the way they rob you when it comes to food in AC!

In any event, the tournament broke for 45 minutes, and there were hundreds of players in the food court scrambling to get some food. Many of the players were young, and all were dressed pretty normal. But watching them pull out these WADS OF CASH, flush with hundred dollar bills.. It was a real sight.

On the way into Atlantic City, a Rolls-Royce Drop-Top pulled up next to me. Sure enough, he pulled into the Borgata! Crazy..

Credit card processing represents a confounding choice for many business owners. Here are some tips I’ve learned over the years to help you evaluate providers and options.

• Get a quote in writing for all fees

All credit card processors have many different fees associated with their merchant accounts. Although similar, the descriptions of these fees can vary from processor to processor. Make sure that all fees are identified and explained, clearly, in writing.

• Weigh price vs. service

Competition is fierce in the credit card processing business. While getting the best discount rate is important, it shouldn’t be the only criterion when selecting a processor. The difference between a couple of basis points in your discount rate and getting paid consistently on time is critical for any business. Also, timely resolution of transaction issues depends on good customer service groups. Be sure to investigate these points and the background of a company before selecting a credit card processor. Beware of the lowest rates!

• Make sure your merchant account fits your business

There are two types of credit card merchant accounts: One is for retail transactions (a card is present and physically swiped) and requires a credit card processing terminal, usually costing $300 to $1000; the other is for non-retail transactions (mail/telephone/Internet) and requires either a Web-based virtual terminal (where the business enters card information) or a direct interface from a Web site (where the customer enters card information). Retail merchant accounts always apply a much higher discount rate for non-retail transactions. Many businesses are unaware they are paying more (per transaction and for unnecessary equipment) by not having the correct type of merchant account.

• Review contract term and cancellation fees

It is extremely important to read and understand the entire merchant contract. Knowing the length of term and cancellation fees in advance can prevent costly headaches when changes are necessary.

• Is there a yearly renewal fee?

Some processors charge yearly renewal fees.

• Review your monthly statements

Credit card monthly statements can be complicated. Be sure to review the first couple of statements in detail to ensure that fees match the quoted terms. After performing an analysis of their statements, many business owners are surprised by the additional fees that contribute to higher transaction costs.

Hope this helps!